Long, Greasy Hair – Who has time to cut their hair or shower when they’re busy terrorising online forum members?
Thick Neck – The carotid artery walls in the neck thicken with the stress of being right all the time.
Bad Posture – A natural effect of having to carry the weight of the ignorant Internet world upon one’s shoulders.
Big Belly – Full of vitriol and Cheetos.
Pale Indoor Complexion – Going outside is for people who fail at the Internet.
Perma-Wrinkle Between Brows – Brought on by being a combination of frustrated and focused all the time.
Bags Under Eyes – Sleepless nights are signs of diligent Internet trolling.
Small Sharp Teeth – From gritting down chompers in fits of resentful anger.
Can in Hand – Access to the reserve of energy needed for firing off inflammatory comments.
Worn-Down Caps Lock Button – Due to excessive internet yelling.
Wrist Brace – To fight off carpal tunnel syndrome.
Sweat Pants – Jeans are just soo restrictive.
Crumb Pile – Taking your eyes off the screen while eating is no-no, even if it means making a mess of Mother’s 1970’s carpet.
Infographic by Get Satisfaction.